Ohmmmmmm, Ohmmmmmm, Ohmmmmm,
February 4, 2011
I need something. I’m not quite sure what it is. Maybe it’s a bottle of wine, or a visit to the spa or a visit south or a visit to a hotel room by myself. I’m not sure what it is, but I know it’s REALLY needed right now. Yesterday I cursed in front of my kids. I know, those of you who know me well are probably thinking; ‘that can’t be the first time she’s cursed in front of her kids’. But really, I don’t swear or curse in front of them.
I had already been Freakout McScreamstein all day because I’m SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO tired of managing mealtimes on my own. Kevin has been working ridiculous hours and he’s rarely home for supper. Yesterday I’d stalled on serving supper just so I’d have the help dealing with the hellions once he got there. At one point during the meal both kids were up from their chairs twirling around like little friggin’ goblins and Kevin did nothing. I yelled, ‘SIT DOWN’! and then everyone, inclucing Kevin, was scared of me for the rest of the meal. Sometimes I scare myself. So Kevin says, “Do you want pyjamas or dishes?” (meaning do I want to get the kids ready for bed or tidy the kitchen). I chose kitchen, duh. So after getting her in her pyjamas (not sure what Kevin was doing at this point) I find Moira with her pants around her ankles crouching in front of the toilet with her hand in the water (she’s FIVE people) and I lose it, “MOIRA, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? HOW OLD ARE YOU? YOU KNOW THAT TOILETS ARE DISGUSTING AND FULL OF GERMS THAT CAN MAKE YOU REALLY SICK. GOOD GOD, CHILD!” and as I walk away I throw the empty egg carton I’d intended to put in the recycling against the stove and grunt, “Jesus Christ, alFUCKINGmighty” (I don’t usually use God’s name in vain, so sorry to all my Christian readers who are about to click ‘unfollow/unsubscribe’). Not sure where Kevin was during all this. Then I’m in the kitchen attempting to finish MY job when Theo is freaking out, “I want Mommy to put my PJs on! I want Mommy to put my PJs on!I want Mommy to put my PJs on!” So I abandon the kitchen to finish getting Theo ready and then read the kids 6 books on the couch and when I’m all done the kitchen is the same as I left it and Kevin is getting his ‘things’ together to go play shinny with his buddies. ARGH!!!!!!!!!!! Please, send me every contest entry form you know of that includes a prize like a trip or a spa package or therapy. My poor kids. 
February 4, 2011 at 8:29 pm
I love your writing!!! I have raved about it to Casey, Jen, Luke, Carol, and your Mom and Dad – there is nothing like “telling it like it is” as I think that it’s way more useful to the people who read it than the “la la” stuff that most people write. I hope that you are planning to write novels (when you have the time (:0)). In the meantime, keep up the great work…
Loads of Love,
Jill (Casey and Luke’s Mom)
February 6, 2011 at 3:56 pm
Thanks Jill!
I’m definitely toying with the idea of writing a novel. Maybe I’ll try a few short stories first!
I appreciate your vote of confidence!
February 5, 2011 at 9:59 pm
Glad to see that, even though they help lots of the time, other peoples husbands too seem to be able to just disappear when you need them most and not even realize it. I really enjoy your writing and agree with Jill that you should be a writer!
February 6, 2011 at 3:57 pm
Thanks Alison! It’s true that my dear husband is helpful most of the time, but when he’s ‘absent’ it’s frustrating!
February 16, 2011 at 9:39 pm
I too love your writing Jo! And your honesty! I do supper on my own most nights of the week too and it is frustrating and exhausting. And of course, being the end of the day, it’s when the girls are the crankiest. And they put on a great performance for whoever is with them that day, but the moment I walk through that door… sigh. You are doing great Jody! And I hear ya loud and clear! Love you!